Got Mad Skills? Ya Might Need More Than That

Are You Likable?

I talk to hundreds of business owners every year [literally] who are so excited to start a business, and they built a website, and they have a logo, and they have their pricing, and they have their ideas… LOTS and LOTS of ideas.

They set everything up and start to network but the phone is not ringing and they can’t land a sale.

We all start a business for our own reasons – usually to solve a problem for a specific group of people, while having independence. Our goal is to grow over time with referrals, and marketing our awesomeness with landing pages, fun social media memes and more. So why do some people rocket to the top quickly and others sort of fizzle out?

Endurance, sure. Competence level, sure. But what about likability? All the social media in the world will not stop a person from crashing if they are not likable in person.

I can’t tell you how many times I have been hired on the spot for stuff with NO initial call, website never reviewed, nor a portfolio requested. Why? Because I spoke at an event and people resonated with me, or I did a podcast and someone out listening thought I sounded like 10 pounds of brilliance with a splash of secret sauce.

What is that thing? It’s whether people like you — and if they like you, they will tell their friends.

Sometimes it can save an unhappy client relationship. Being charming and positive goes such a long way that I dare you to compliment everyone you see for the next week, and watch what happens!

I’m not a super jovial person and I really do have sort of a Resting B!@#$ Face that is unmistakeable. However – people say that I listen well and my proposals show that I heard their needs.

Nobody talks enough about this, but there a best-selling book called “How to Win Friends & Influence People” so … hello?!  It’s important!!!!

Why am I even bothering writing about this? Because I am an introvert and I struggled for 10 years with this.

Seems counterintuitive but I really like my alone time. I enjoy the company of others but I get very burned out after a while and I have never been great at asking others about their lives. It truly was not because I didn’t care, it was because I was taught growing up not to be nosey.

Two things my mom always told me: Don’t Stare At People, and Don’t Be So Nosey! 

Come to find out, people actually like to talk about themselves and will open up about their wants, needs and personal life if you show sincere interest. The ironic thing is that I have always been genuinely interested in others i just trained myself not to ask anything so I would not seem offensive.

Well, those internal dialogues of insecurity, fear and anxiety about showing genuine interest in someone else were completely made up and now that I have broken through that barrier, it’s GAME ON!

Here are some things you can do:

  • Smile and compliment someone’s clothing or jewelry;
  • Make a joke or positive comment about the food/venue;
  • Share something personal about yourself, like you have a pet poodle named Harry;
  • And FOLLOW UP! Email, call or use Send Out Cards to send a personal note by snail mail (people LOVE this).

1 Comment on Got Mad Skills? Ya Might Need More Than That

  1. Graciela
    April 21, 2016 at 6:06 am (2 years ago)

    My fave line:”I did a podcast and someone out listening thought I sounded like 10 pounds of brilliance with a splash of secret sauce.”



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